WC and D take on Beck

 WC and D take on Beck.

 My Beck ARC’s provided me a long list of common sabotaging thoughts that I have assigned to WC and D. 

 

Dictator Disguises
Inner critic 

You’re fat.

You have to lose weight

You’re a failure.

You look terrible.

You’d better track that!

Why are you so fat?

Look at you belly.

It your fault

You always eat too much

You said you would exercise 

You promised to eat healthy
Polly Perfectionist

Willpower

Restrictive dieting is the only way
Negative Nelly

This is never going to work

You’ll never succeed 

You promised you’d be good

Wild Child Disguises
Inner Toddler

Inner Rebel

I don’t care

I can’t 

It’s okay

I forgot

Overeating feels good

It won’t matter

It’s too hard

It’s just a bite.

I love Fatty, Salty, Sweet foods!

I want it now

Just this once

I’m hungry when I’m not
Fraidy cat
Burned out 
Self Sabotage 

That looks good!
Discouraged 

Exercise is no fun
Emotional eater 
Deprived 

You never let me
Amnesia Victim 

I didn’t eat that

 

Copying and pasting all of BessHaile’s TheBrains, I felt her attitude towards them change. The Boss grew softer, kinder and was more gentle when talking with TheBrains. Over time, she grew to love them just as they are. She shared responsibility with them for their behavior. The Boss never made plans without consulting with TheBrains and whenever their plans weren’t working out she new she needed their help to create a new plan. Their thoughts and feelings helped her clarify what was going on and helped all of them to agree on a path forward. 

 

My inner moderator isn’t a harsh authoritarian because she doesn’t actually have an absolute veto power. In truth, she can say “No Choice!” but it doesn’t always work. The Boss’ kind, gentle way of interacting, reminded me of my mothering skills. This has helped me interact with WC and D differently. I have come to accept that their feelings and thoughts deserve my respect. Honoring them and meeting their needs in non-food ways keeps them happy so they are less likely to strike out in anger. Moderator me is happier, too. We share responsibility for our actions. Blame and shame are giving way to cooperation. We are a team and together we can be successful.

 

 

Comments

  1. OneKidsMomJuly 22, 2021 at 6:43 PM

    The compassionate observer, stepping outside, understanding all the various pieces are saying... yes, we need to grow that compassionate nurturing "inner mom"... who knows the real problem is that the toddler needs a nap, the teenager needs limits, and the critic needs a time-out! And yes, I love BessHaile's brains, too!

    ReplyDelete
  2. speded2 (Jeanne)July 23, 2021 at 8:37 AM

    Hugs!

    ReplyDelete
  3. besshaileAugust 6, 2021 at 1:31 PM

    Hey there. After a crazy busy July and some community drama this past week, I'm just getting around to answering your comment on my blogpost. It is so interesting to hear how you interpreted my blog posts with TheBrains. Would you believe it - there are over 500 of them!!!! Of course, often they just pop in and out of a blogpost TheBoss intended to do all by herself. The truth is - I have always loved all 3 personas - even if Left Brain is bossy and Right Brain gets sort of bratty. It was my biggest problem with both Martha Beck - who introduced me to TheBrains and Julia Cameron's The Artist's Way. Well - and Judith Beck. All 3 of these authors are just way too harsh and assume you have some harsh critic hounding you too.

    Anyway - I'll be sending out a spark mail message with details about the book, its launch date and other data.

    Hard to realize there are only 11 more days of Spark left. oh well. as Judith Beck would say:

    Oh Well.

    Hugs to you

    ReplyDelete

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